Categories
my life positivity

loner

I like doing things alone better.

I am an only child so that may make more sense… maybe?

Whatever the case may be I’ve never disliked being alone.

However, this is not the case for all.

Rather than asking why others dislike solitude, I thought about why I enjoy being alone!

‘ME TIME’

Don’t get me wrong — I like being social!

But I also enjoy spending time by myself.

Recharge yourself. It’s necessary.

I AM AN INDEPENDENT WOMAN

There is a certain satisfaction in doing something outside of the norm.

We all know it.

Being alone in public tends to be one of those taboo things.

So yeah, if I go to a happy hour alone to journal it is okay to feel confident in your difference!

Just follow through with what feels good for you.

You’ll be amazed by how awesome happiness feels!

APPRECIATE YOURSELF

Something I have learned overtime is that no will be will able to give you love you’re “looking for”.

You have to love yourself.
That’s the only way.
All that good (cliche) bullsh*t.

Hey, I don’t make the rules!

Think about all the joys of solitude, such as no one else to account for or answer to.

It is freeing!

Do you guys like having alone time?
Let me know in the comments below!

Talk to y’all soon,
Alex

Categories
my life positivity

becoming overwhelmed

If you were to ask anyone who personally knows me they would describe my life as “hectic” or “chaotic” — no doubt in my mind! My life, just like everyone else’s, is complicated. As I mentioned in my first post, I have experienced many significant changes in my life within the past few months. And to be completely honest, I was very overwhelmed at first. I had a mini freak out, took a breath then realized: This is a normal response!  

Just like many other people I have a natural tendency to shut down when I begin to feel overwhelmed. My shoulders rise to my ears and my heart rate increases. At times when I’m really stressed out I even experience dizziness. These physical responses coupled with the intense mental strain causes everything, in that moment, to seem as though it’s too much to handle. This is exactly what happened to me when I tried to imagine what life was throwing at me. 

Life is a roller coaster! For the sake of this metaphor, this car has a lot more than one seat. Adrenaline junkie or not, everyone consciously choose to run the ride with each decision they make. Unfortunately, the part that sucks is that it’s your job to repair the ride when it breaks down. Too often we are distracted living within our own worlds that we forget the choices we make affect not only us, but those around us…

While the easiest option was to remain stagnant and be upset about the situation, this was not an option for me. So what did I do? I was forced to come to terms with the fact that the situation I was in was the result of choices I consciously made. Once I understood that, it was time to roll up my sleeves and attempt to repair this thing… and did I mention my tool skills were limited??

I devoted every ounce of my being to getting the ride back on track. With tenacious effort and mentoring from my amazing support system I was able to get the ride operating! Aside from feeling accomplished for repairing the mechanism, I refined my utilitarian skills. These skills allow me to be proactive in repairing minor issues before they cause a major malfunction. 

When it comes to my support system, I largely attribute my character development to my godmother. This woman is wise beyond her years and more than willing to share her philosophies with those who will listen. She is one of the most sensible people I know — making her one of the only people I truly listen to. I largely accredit her for my methods of dealing with stressful situations. Similarly to my aunt, I want to share my tips with those of you who are willing to listen. 

Pause and observe the situation.

I feel as though it is important to feel your emotions rather than suppress and hide them away in an attempt to forget them. You are allowed to freak out… but only for five minutes. 

No actually — Set a timer on how long you’re going to mope. Limit the amount of time you allow yourself to feel the stress and anxiety of being overwhelmed. Then move on and get over it! 

Emotional repression is actually damaging to your physical health! Countless studies show “feeling bad is good,” however, put a time limit on the negativity and prepare yourself to conquer the world. 

haha relevant

Take control.

I am a list person — I love making lists! Creating a physical representation of what you need to accomplish (…a list…) has been proven to help build mental strength. 

Feel free to flip flop this with feeling the emotions too! My typical process is making the list then freaking out over how much I have to do… then breaking it down and getting sh*t done!

One step at a time.

steps

Forreal though, deal with everything in small pieces. The inspiration for this post came to me  while I was (attempting to) clean and organize my bedroom. I tend to look at the chaotic wreck that is my room, imagine what I could be doing with the space then flopping onto my bed because I have no idea where to even begin cleaning, haha. 

As you can imagine, this is not a productive method. What do I do? Clean one part of the room at a time. I started with my tallest dresser, organizing my skincare routine, hair accessories and assorted decor until it was aesthetically appealing to me and I was content with my efforts. This same method can be applied to life; each action is a step you are taking towards a goal. 

Take a break.

Like most humans, I enjoy immediate gratification and the feeling of accomplishment accompanied with it. However, immediate gratification is a fleeting feeling; creating lasting happiness is a process. It is OKAY to not get everything done at once, so long as you are making progress along the way. Your physical body heals itself while you’re resting. The same applies to your brain — you have to allow yourself time to relax and unwind. 

It took me a little over five months to figure out what I now know. Although I may sound like I know what I’m talking about — I don’t. I am still learning, just like you. However, you have been fortunate and stumbled upon my tips to help you expedite your progress. 😉

Thanks for reading!

Talk to ya’ll soon,
Alex

References:
http://www.chopratreatmentcenter.com/blog/2017/04/26/heal-suppressed-emotional-pain/
https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/insight-therapy/201009/emotional-acceptance-why-feeling-bad-is-good
https://www.fastcompany.com/3063392/how-writing-to-do-lists-helps-your-brain-even-when-you-dont-comple

Categories
my life

mini life update

It is no exaggeration to say your 20’s are a period of incredible growth and development. People change and grow apart as they gain new insight to the world — it is natural. Similarly to other young adults, I have experienced situations which have altered my perception of reality and I am now observing the world from a different perspective. With that being said: 

Those of you who don’t know me, hi, I’m Alex! …and for those of you who do know me, hi, I’m Alex. 

I’m not the same person I was a year ago — hell, I’m not even the same person I was six months ago! And I hope I am not the same person six months or a year from now. I have become, and strive to continue becoming, the best version of myself.

As some of you are aware from my previous post, my life has experienced quite a few radical changes, including taking time off work and classes, transferring universities and moving! While changes of this magnitude may cause you to become overwhelmed incredibly easily, it’s important to work through whatever life throws at you in order to flourish and grow. ☺️
^No worries — I have a later post coming with more on dealing with that. 😋

Up until about sophomore year of college, the idea of changing myself was incredibly intimidating. Luckily, I am now able to admit my perception of reality was skewed by delusions concocted in my own mind. For too long I allowed myself to believe the world was against me. I am proud to say I’ve expanded my world view and I am beyond excited to embrace the opportunities life offers me. 

I know, now you’re asking, “What may those opportunities be?” To be honest, I’m not entirely sure yet. However, I would like to believe my future is promising and for the first time I am looking at the world optimistically. 😇🤞☺️

Now for some questions I’ve been asked a lot recently:

Where did you move? 

I moved back to good ol’ South Philly, which is where I spent a large portion of my childhood. I forgot the weird part about being back in South Philly is that some families, like mine, have lived here for 70+ years and everybody knows each other… So nearly everyone knows who I am and I know no one. (smiley) But yeah, I moved in with my godmother and her husband — they’re awesome. Special shoutout to Aunt Leen!! 

What have you been up to?? 

I’ve been chillin’, honestly. But productively! I’ve spent a lot of time reading, writing and pondering. No, it is not as studious as it sounds. These are things I hadn’t had the time to do in the past, so I had a lot to catch up on! One of the most beneficial things I learned is how to be comfortable with silence. Annnnd I also did a lot of eating, sleeping, working out and socializing. Up until the past week or so, I have had a jam packed schedule! Granted, it was nothing incredibly structured but still busy nonetheless. (tongue) 

Where are you transferring? Why?

“Someone said you look like an owl!” “WHO??” 

Haha, I couldn’t NOT. I will be starting at Temple University in the fall! Woot woot! Temple Owls… get it?? Anyway, I’m really excited to continue studying public relations at TU. I don’t know all the details yet since, just like everything else in my life, transferring from Drexel University is not simple. However, the transfer is worth it because of Temple’s awesome PR program. There are a few women I have followed since we all began college and I have witnessed their platforms grow exponentially. I am ready for my time to shine. (sunglasses) 

I feel like these kind of hit everything without too much depth. I mean, that’s what the blog posts themselves are for, right? 😋

Thanks for reading!

Talk to y’all soon,
Alex